１、２、３、４、５、６、７、８、９
JULIANNE
(to the slip)
You're going where?
EXT. WALLACE ESTATE - DAY
Julianne climbs from her taxi. Only slightly in awe, she sets off
past the reflecting pool, which fronts a mansion of graceful stone
and timber. It's a hike today, because the circular drives is
clogged deep with Bentleys, Mercedes, and waiting limos, vying for
space with a score of delivery vehicles of all kinds, maintenance
trucks, catering and florist and food vans.
INT. GREAT ROOM - DAY
Julianne escorted into an enormous room, where brunch is in
progress for more than a hundred. She looks from the vaulted
ceilings, to the frescoed walls, the inlaid floors, the massive
pipe organ above the stone staircase, the oil portraits of Scottish
ancestors and their favorite dogs.
Isabelle has risen from the main table, and comes to her. All
smiles. Julianne is in the Twilight Zone. What are these people
laughing about? Do they still think there's a wedding?
ISABELLE
Jules. We're so glad you
slept in.
Takes her arm graciously. This woman would make Anne Bancroft look
coarse. As they walk...
ISABELLE
Now, you have a choice. The idea
is bride and groom shouldn't see
each other on the magic day...
Julianne looking all around. Magic day it seems to be. Where the
bell is a bride or a groom?
ISABELLE
So Michael stays put in the garden.
Kimmy stays in here...
Pointing. THERE she is, obscured by a cluster of the appropriately
fawning. She has the same hunted eyes and false, slightly manic
smile Julianne wore yesterday. This, at least, makes sense.
ISABELLE (O.S.)
... and the guests go back and
forth. Where will you start?
CLOSE on Julianne. Watching the brave, frightened bride.
JULIANNE
She looks tense.
ISABELLE (O.S., calmly)
Nerves. I would never have
guessed.
EXT. ROSE GARDEN - DAAY
A steward leads Julianne to the edge of an expansive rose garden,
altogether elegant and comfortable with its long white picnic
tables, where nearly a hundred guests casually dine, served by
rolling carts.
There, at the head table, Michael staring at us. He looks like a
poor attempt to cover a hard night. She locks onto his eyes. What
the hell is going on? He looks helpless, miserable. She gestures
with her head, follow me. Stalks off.
EXT. SCULPTURE GARDEN - DAY
Bronze abstract pieces, some quite large, face a huge set of
children's swings, regulation playground size. Julianne sits in
one, moving slightly back and forth. Trying to hold on to her
temper and her sanity.
In the distance, trucks are winding their way to and from the pond,
where crews are setting up tents, lights, heaters for tonight. The
circus has come to town. When she looks back...
Michael approaches. Before he can draw a breath...
JULIANNE
I had the craziest dream last
night? Walter and Kimmy had
asked your boss to...
MICHAEL
Look, I came down here to face
everybody. I didn't want to
slink away like some coward...
JULIANNE
But the Scotch salmon was so
fucking good, you decided to
stay for brunch!
MICHAEL
She hasn't told anybody, what
am I supposed to do?
JULIANNE
Get married, apparently.
She comes OFF the swing, PUSHES him back two feet.
JULIANNE
What the hell are you thinking
of, the goddamn wedding is SIX
O'CLOCK!!
He swallows hard. Trapped.
MICHAEL
This is her family and her
fault.
JULIANNE
And your point?
MICHAEL
(ten years old)
Well. How come she didn't...
JULIANNE
BECAUSE SHE'S AS CHICKENSHIT AS
YOU ARE, YOU MORONS ARE MADE FOR
EACH OTHER.
He just blinks.
MICHAEL
Hey. This is a serious matter.
Thank you. She POKES his chest, punctuating...
JULIANNE
I'll be right back.
INT. KITCHEN - DAY
A modern take on the Medieval castle kitchen, towering ceilings,
dark wood, copper pots hanging, a series of walk-in coolers and
freezers. The place is a madhouse of activity, as prep cooks
slice, chop, sort, every kind of food imaginable, and delivery
teams bring more.
The girls walk through. Alone together in the eye of the
hurricane. Kim choked with excess sentiment...
KIMMY
Look at all this beautiful food,
so lovingly prepared...
JULIANNE
They'll eat it anyway, you ever
been to a walk?
Kimmy's lip trembles. This is not how she thought of her wedding.
The din is so horrific, Kimmy leads them into a walk-in meat
locker. Even here, two BUTCHERS are dressing Eastern-fresh corn-
fed carcasses.
JULIANNE
You guys want to give us a
minute?
The men blink at each other.
JULIANNE
We'd like to be alone with
our pork.
On that basis. They leave. Kimmy sits on a stack of packaged
frozen fowl parts. Stares up with big, sweet, wet eyes.
KIMMY
How's he doing?
Julianne cannot believe this.
JULIANNE
Who? The jerk who's running
your life?
KIMMY
This must be... very, very,
hard on him.
JULIANNE
What with the psychosis and
all, yeah.
Leans in. Listen...
JULIANNE
When are you gonna come clean
with your folks?
KIMMY
Don't you see...
JULIANNE
If you're waiting for "Do you
take this man?", that's
considered poor form.
KIMMY
... that this is all my fault?
Stops Julianne cold. Your fault.
KIMMY
Whatever delusions I drove him to,
there is truth at the heart of it.
I want him to work for my father.
I want to stay in school. I want
a life of my own!
Harder and harder for Julianne to push. Her mouth is dry.
JULIANNE
Yeah, well, lots of couples are imcompat...
KIMMY
I love him.
Fragile and strong at once. A plea.
KIMMY
Tell him it's my fault and
that I love him.
A long beat.
JULIANNE
I'll be right back.
EXT. TENNIS COURT - DAY
The court has become a giant holding pen for tonight's BALLOONS.
There are maybe a billion in assorted colors already blowing in all
directions, under clear plastic sheeting which has ben spread
across the top of the court's chain-link fence.
Michael stands outside the court, clutching the chain link like a
prisoner, as Julianne comes through the gate. From somewhere, we
hear high, squeaky, alien voice-like SOUNDS. Incongruous
against...
MICHAEL
How is she?
Julianne absorbs this. As the bizarre SOUNDS continue, she WHIRLS
around...
JULIANNE
KNOCK IT OFF!!!
We now see three STONER COLLEGE GUYS, who have been filling the
endless array of balloons from helium tanks at center court.
Clearly, they've been inhaling their working materials.
STONER KID
(Minnie Mouse)
YES, SIR!
A Nazi salute. When she turns back...
MICHAEL
I asked you...
JULIANNE
She admits it's her fault.
He absorbs that. And then...
MICHAEL
Do you think she still loves
me?
We watch the struggle inside her. Her voice drops...
JULIANNE
Sure, she does. She's crazy
about you.
Now tears stand in both their eyes. The stoners are doing their
Alvin and the Chipmuks impersonation festival in the B.G., singing
in castrato harmony. But our two don't notice.
MICHAEL
I keep asking, how can I explain
what happened? And I keep
getting that same answer all
night long.
Which is...
MICHAEL
I can't. And it doesn't matter.
I drove her to it, because I
want things my way. And even
if she did something tricky and
unfair... she was blinded by
love, okay?
Julianne swallows. For obvious reasons.
JULIANNE
Does that make it right...
MICHAEL
Love doesn't have to be right.
It just has to be love.
The stoner are now helium-crooning "Bridge Over Troubled Waters."
Actually, they're getting better.
MICHAEL
She's giving up half her life
for me, and I'm bitching because
it hurts her.
STONERS
(singing)
Sail on silver girl
Sail on by...
MICHAEL
She's a saint! And I'm a
worthless ingrate!
STONERS
(singing)
Your time has come to shine,
All your dreams are on their way...
MICHAEL
Tell her. I'll marry her at six
o'clock, if she'll still have me.
The stoners blend on the high note. It's pretty moving.
JULIANNE
I'll be right back.
INT. ORGAN LOFT - DAY
PAN along a gigantic serpentine stack of wedding presents. Nearly
twelve feet high, the pile curves along the balcony, high above the
diners in the Great Room, extending al the way to...
... an organ loft. Alone, above the noise of the party, Julianne
and Kimmy have just reached the top of the staircase. Trapped
between ten tons of lavish gifts and the keyboard of the mammoth
organ. Dwarfed by their surroundings, Kimmy draws the hardest
breath of her life...
KIMMY
(whispers)
So. What did he say?
Julianne's eyes move over the young girl's face.
JULIANNE
He said. Marry me.
Kimmy YELPS in her ecstasy, FLINGING herself against Julianne, and
they go DOWN full length across the organ's pedals, BLASTING the
room with a MONSTER CHORD of china-rattling volume and horrifying
disharmony.
As grown men and women SCREAM in spontaneous terror below, Kimmy
begins to...
... LAUGH. And KISS and hug her new sister. And holds her tight.
EXT. WILLOW POND - DAY
Julianne and Michael walk the gravel path beside a breathtaking
POND, ringed with WILLOWS that dig heavy branches to the water's
surface. He is relieved, reflective. Head down, he never notices
that she is...
... dangerously freaked. Too petrified even to hyperventilate,
we're lucky she's breathing at all. We watch her life unraveling
before her glassy eyes.
MICHAEL
(never looks up)
Thank God you were here.
JULIANNE
(mumbles to herself)
Oh, yeah.
MICHAEL
I was so confused, so conflicted,
so... unstable.
JULIANNE
Well, it happens.
They pass an expanse of lawn which has become the event parking
area. Family vehicles, delivery trucks, service vans. Everything
that couldn't fit on the circular front driveway.
MICHAEL
I might have thrown away...
Searching for the right words.
JULIANNE
... your one chance for true
happiness?
MICHAEL
... yeah, that.
JULIANNE
You never want to do that, see,
that's always a... costly
turnover. As they say in the
sport biz.
There's a vague Stepford Wife quality to her voice. He hears that
now, and looks at her. Maybe he can't tell she's frightened. But
he can tell she's something.
MICHAEL
(softly)
Are you okay?
She stops walking. She can't look at him, so she looks around.
Across the lawn crews are moving equipment into the brightly-
colored tents, unfolding and setting up stacks of tables and
chairs, raising the poles between which all those balloons will be
strung. At the center of it all...
.... a huge topiary White Sox batter, just completing a murderous
swing. He's maybe fifteen feet tall. She points to it...
JULIANNE
The Big Hurt, huh?
MICHAEL
Nellie Fox. Walter likes the
past. And he likes the little
guys.
So Julianne nods. Because she does too. Squints up at Michael.
JULIANNE
Got a minute?
He nods, you bet. Worried for her. What is this? She looks in
another direction, and we now see that we have nearly reached...
... a stage that's been set up for the band. Chairs, music stands,
sound equipment. A gleaming dance floor, already in place over the
lawn. Next to it, a shimmering white GAZEBO. Like the centerpiece
of a wedding cake.
JULIANNE
Why is the dance floor by the
gazebo?
She takes his hand. They walk toward it.
MICHAEL
Kimmy's idea. She thought it
would be such a romantic place.
For our wedding dance.
Looking down at her.
MICHAEL
What's up?
JULIANNE Shhh.
Up the white steps now. Together. The gazebo floor has been
covered with hardwood. The perfect place. For a wedding dance.
And Julianne...
... turns, suddenly. He almost runs into her. She is staring up
at him, so strangely, their bodies only inches apart. He is caught,
transfixed by the intensity in her eyes.
JULIANNE
I have to say this quick, okay,
or I'll have this massive
coronary and you'll never have
to hear it. Which you need to.
Does that make any sense at all?
The coronary part does. We can feel her heart beating from here.
MICHAEL
Jules, what's wrong...
JULIANNE
This is the dumbest thing I will
ever do. So dumb, in fact, that
I can't. I don't think.
And then, she does. She puts her hands flat on his chest. Looks
in his eyes.
JULIANNE
Michael, I love you.
A heartbeat passes.
JULIANNE
I've loved you for nine years,
but I was too arrogant and
scared to realize it. Now I'm
just scared.
He stares at her, dumbstruck. She moves even closer.
JULIANNE
I know this comes at an
inopportune time, but I have to
ask this one really gigantic
favor, okay?
Holds her breath. And...
JULIANNE
Choose me. Marry me. Let me
make you happy.
And in a half beat of excruciating silence...
JULIANNE
I know. It sounds like three
favors.
His eyes are loving. They care for her. She swallows, lost in
them.
JULIANNE
But when you think about it...
Slides her arms around his neck, and raises her mouth...
... to his. The most beautiful kiss she will ever offer. All of
her heart is in this, and as his hands touch her body...
... a SCREAM rips the world to pieces. They whirl to see...
... KIMMY, halfway up the path. Her hands across her mouth, as if
to stem the horror that pours forth as she SHRIEKS from her soul,
and...
... runs. Back Down the path. Michael BOLTING after her, SHOUTING
her name. A frozen moment, and...
... Julianne TAKES OFF after him. All three running, SCREAMING
their various emotions at the top of their lungs, as workmen stop
to watch from neighboring countries. Kimmy, staring from halfway there, has an insurmountable lead.
LEAPS into her convertible and PEELS OUT, just TEARING up the
gravel as she ROCKETS out of sight. No way to catch her. Still...
... Michael is racing for the cars. Julianne, sprinting her guts
out, losing ground with every stride. Michael JUMPS into a
Cherokee...
JULIANNE
MICHAEL, DON'T, YOU'LL NEVER
CATCH HER!!
He GRINDS the gears. She keeps RUNNING. His engine FIRES.
JULIANNE
SHE HAS TOO BIG A LEAD AND SHE
DRIVES LIKE A RABID ANIMAL!!!
He BLASTS OFF. She keeps going. Gasping for air, clutching her side,
she's dying here. Slams into a florist's truck, looks inside, shit!
Next, a butcher's van, looks inside, Jesus!
JULIANNE
(to the world at large)
DOESN'T ANYBODY LEAVE KEYS
ANYMORE? WHATEVER HAPPENED TO
TRUST??
Up ahead, Michael has STALLED the Cherokee. She still has a chance,
DASHES to the next van. BORNSTEIN EXTERMINATION, a handsome
rendering of a rat above the TOXIC MATERIALS warning FLINGS the
door open. Stumbles in. Keys!
JULIANNE (O.S.)
THANK GOD, A SAMARITAN!!
Michael SPEEDS away. She KICKS the ratmobile in gear.
LURCHES off.
INT. RATMOBILE, DOWNTOWN CHICAGO - DAY
Julianne tearing through traffic, desperately struggling to keep
Michael's Cherokee in view, while she shrieks into her cellular...
JULIANNE
IT IS NOT GOING WELL!
Down the block, Michael WHIPS around a corner. We follow suit to see
his destination dead ahead. Union Station. The DISPATCHER RADIO
intrudes...
DISPATCHER (O.S.)
Uh, Unit Four Baker Charlie,
how we cookin' on that Skokiie
infestation?
Now she's steering the car, tearing at the radio controls, and
screaming into the phone cradled on her shoulder...
JULIANNE
THIS IS WHAT COMES OF TELLING
THE TRUTH!
FIELD MAN (O.S.)
Copy, dispatcher...
JULIANNE
OR EVEN PART OF IT!
FIELD MAN (O.S.)
Uh, what happens if you got
that methyl-ethyl shit on
your hands?
Michael RIPS into the train station's parking lot. We SWERVE
around a taxi, CUT OFF Harley, CAREEN into the lot...
JULIANNE
GETTING WHAT YOU DESERVE IS
NOT FAIR!
DISPATCHER (O.S.)
Uh, you got maybe thirty seconds
before you're sterile. For God's
sake don't touch yourself, or
anything.
Up ahead, Michael is OUT of his jeep and running.
JULIANNE
AND I HATE TALKING TO YOUR
MACHINE!
She SLAMS on the brakes, THROWING herself against the wheel.
YOUNGER FIELD MAN (O.S.)
Uh, this is One Monkey Zebra.
It wasn't bees in the gal's
wall, it was cats!
She TEARS the door open. SCRAMBLE OUT...
YOUNGER FIELD MAN (O.S.)
She says gas 'em, anyway,
she'll pay cash. Uh... how
do I pay this?
WITH Julianne now, RACING through the lot, Michael vanishes INTO
the Station, she PLUNGES in after him, BOUNCING off bystanders,
apologizing, lunging on, gasping for breath, past exhaustion,
threatening clumsily through the crowd like a staggering drunk,
catching a lucky glimpse as he heads...
... DOWN a staircase to the TRACKS. My God, what's he doing? A
second wind, fueled by panic, and she BOLTS after him, DANCING down
the steep staircase somehow without killing herself, reaching the
concourse to see him, running for...
... Track 29, a train already RUMBLING, ready to pull out, she
SPRINTS after him.
JULIANNE
MICHAEL!!
He DISAPPEARS behind the train, she FALLS, skids, springs up,
pushes through gaping onlookers, almost there, the train PULLS
AWAY...
JULIANNE NNNOOOO!!!
But he's just standing there. His back to us. Watching it go.
Her body nearly collapses with relief. She pushes herself on, but
her legs aren't working right in their maxed-out fatigue, and she
lopes and staggers until she comes up behind him. He's still lost
in thought, staring after the train.
She tries to speak, but there's no breath. So she puts her hands
on her knees and just GASPS for air like a dog. Wheezing, panting,
trying once more to speak, but she can't yet, and then he casually
turns and...
... JUMPS out of his skin! A heart attack seeing her.
JULIANNE
(croaks)
Don't speak!
He just blinks at this sweaty, ripped-up, maniacal figure.
MICHAEL
Uh. I saw that moving...
JULIANNE
DON'T SPEAK!
FLINGING both her hands across his mouth. A frozen beat. He nods,
okay. Cautiously, she takes her hands away. At least she has made
him smile, in spite of everything. At least she's done that.
JULIANNE
I have to make a confession.
Another confession. Besides
that I love you. This is even
worse.
This. He's waiting to hear.
JULIANNE
The E-mail? You thought Walter
sent your boss? I wrote that.
You. WHAT?! Synapse overload.
MICHAEL
You're not saying you actually...
you're saying that y...
JULIANNE
(stricken with remorse)
... wrote it, yeah. I'm the
bad guy.
MICHAEL
ARE YOU CRAZY?
She nods her head wildly, hair flopping.
MICHAEL
ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY INSANE??
Bigger nodding.
MICHAEL
ARE YOU ON DRUGS???
Shakes her head, like a two-year-old.
MICHAEL
(pacing in circles)
I mean, do you realize what
you've... well, of course you
realize, that's why you're
confessing, I mean... I mean...
how could you do that?
１、２、３、４、５、６、７、８、９
